Category Archives: Uncategorized

March 1, 2013 · 2:25 pm

The Oscars Kick Off EDAW. (Which Is a Bad Thing.)

I haven’t been here for a while, which probably means that you haven’t been here for a while, either! But I’m back to let you know that my NEW blog, the one on my NEW website, ED Educate, is up and running.

Not only that, but it’s been selected for inclusion in NEDA’s Eating Disorder Awareness Week blogroll. I’m honored to be in such good company!

Here’s my latest post, called The Oscars Kick Off EDAW. (Which is a Bad Thing.) It’s all about the Oscars, that bit on boobs, Eating Disorder Awareness Week, and what Mindy Kaling has to say about things.

I’ve moved to a new home on twitter, @Dr_UdallWeiner, and on Facebook, ED Educate. Please come by for a visit–I’d love to see you.

Is Facebook Making Your Child a Narcissist?

These days, my house has become a movie set. Not for anything grand or elaborate, but for recording blond heads which bob in and out of the frame, and bodies which do Olympic-inspired jumps and leaps.

Ipad. Iphone. Camcorder. We do it all.

But at times, I wonder about the effect of all this moving making. I wonder about how my children—and your children—will be impacted by having so much of their lives captured and preserved. By staring in a movie that begins the moment they enter this world, and continues on without end.

When kids seem themselves onscreen, they watch in wonder. They are mesmerized by how their face looks when they scrunch it up, amazed that they can do that thing with their tongue, proud at the sound of their own voice. Kids get something very basic from watching themselves: confirmation of existence; recognition of the self. “Whoa, that’s me.”

Almost anyone would find such self-absorption annoying in an adult. But for a child, it represents narcissism in an age-appropriate way; kids are supposed to be self-consumed and egotistical. As my 4 year-old recently said to me, “I’m the most special kid at school, so I don’t have to follow the rules.” Never mind the fact that I turned white and nearly choked on my sandwich; never mind that she said it eyes askance, in that testing, 4 year-old way: what she said was patently normal. Continue reading →

15 Comments

Filed under Media, Motherhood, Parenting, Uncategorized

Tagged as child development, Dr. Dana Udall-Weiner, Facebook, Narcissism, Social Media and Children

August 6, 2012 · 6:28 am

Why I Write (and Get to Live Twice)

“Writers live twice.” Natalie Goldberg

Maybe it’s because the frenetic pulse of early summer, with all its heat and promise, has started to slow. Or maybe it’s because my own intense and consuming projects will soon come to a quiet close–their messy ends gathered, tucked, and woven into near completion. But whatever the reason, my urge to write has drifted back.

For me, this urge is usually associated with a thirst for solitude and quiet contemplation. It’s as though my social side has danced wildly, and now seeks repose. Extroversion replaced by introversion. Talking replaced by noticing. Living not just once, but twice. Continue reading →

6 Comments

Filed under Being Authentic, Motherhood, Navel Gazing (or More About Me), Self Care, Uncategorized, Writing

Tagged as Creativity, Natalie Goldberg, the Writing Process, Writing and Motherhood

March 26, 2012 · 2:49 pm

Who Were You, Before You Knew?

You are all dancers.

This, from a wise teacher named Sarah, to a class of Nia students who spanned the spectrum of form and fitness. This, to a class bound more by a shared loved of movement, and a hedonistic drive for pleasure, than by any perfectionistic notion that we were there to master the jazz square.

You are all dancers.

Her message was met by groans, many of us embarrassed to accept that designation, hesitant to believe that it could ever apply to us.

Because dancer implies that someone is good at dancing, or maybe that she gets paid to move for the pleasure of others (and, we hope, for her own pleasure, too). But at one time, when we were mere wisps of the adults we would one day become, all of us danced in the most organic sense; we instinctively moved our bodies, naturally inclined to jerk and sway and stomp. We responded to rhythm that pulsated in our heads; we translated sweet melodies into motion. Before we gave it a name, and self-consciously defined the act of moving, we were all dancers.

During that precious period when the me is not yet delineated from the not-me, our curiosity is expansive, our confidence deep. We are tree-climbers and singers and poets and soccer players. Because we do these activities. And that is sufficient.

But somewhere along the way, most of us discard these labels—these identities—as we discard the pink tutu and the paintbrush. Who me? I’m not a dancer. Or a singer. Or an artist. Or a writer. Or a swimmer… Continue reading →

6 Comments

Filed under Being Authentic, Motherhood, Parenting, Self Care, Uncategorized

Tagged as Adulthood, Dana Udall-Weiner, Growing Up, Nia

June 21, 2011 · 9:08 am

Yee Haw! The Roundup on Bravery (SDWW)

It’s rodeo time here in Santa Fe, which means bulls and barrels and roundups aplenty. But today, I’m thinking about a roundup of a different kind, since I’ve had the honor of hosting this month’s Self-Discovery, Word by Word series. Today, thanks to all of these layered, wise, and soul-searching posts, I’m thinking about bravery.

Bravery, as you’ll see, looks different for each of us; its particulars vary in accordance with who we are, how we live, what we need. And yet many of us have sought to embody bravery for the same purpose: to value and present our authentic selves; to tolerate and find comfort within the very real delineations of our identity.

(Who knew it took so much courage just to be real?)

Thanks again to all those who took the time to craft such beautiful posts. Happy reading!

Bravery in Unexpected Places (by Weightless)

Confidence Takes Courage (by Health for the Whole Self)

Bravery: A Little Every Day (by Mind, Body & Scroll)

On Feeling Small and Learning to be Brave (by Medicinal Marzipan)

Bravery and OCPD (by The Writing Goddess)

One Brave Little Soul (by Nourishing the Soul)

I Never Thought I was Brave (by Voice in Recovery)

It Takes Guts to be Your Kind of Awesome (by Looking in the Mirror)

On Bravery: Why Jumping out of Planes is Easy (by Cynosure)

What Bravery Means to Me (by Chibi Jeebs & the Neurotic Struggle)